Just a helmet.

I arrived at 4:05am sharp without a bike at the start of the Two Oceans Crash. A bike ride (race) traversing the 56km course of the Two Oceans Marathon before the runners take to the closed roads. Not sure what to expect, 30hrs later, I still can’t wipe the smile off my face.

At precisely 4:10am Du Toit arrived. Two wheels, four pedals and strong beam of light. This exquisite receptacle of synchronized leg power deserves a name and requires a captain. When Andrew Wheeldon suggested we ride the event on a tandem a few days prior, I laughed out loud right at the text message invitation – so much so that I needed to excuse myself from the room at the time. Why not he said?

Why not indeed.

Not having ridden in any timed or planned event that required a water bottle, I went and bought a water bottle…and what I like to call my ‘work pants’. This was the sum total of my preparation. I know enough about endurance events to know that riding hard a day or two before is only going to do your body harm by depleting reserves. So instead I went shopping for supplies, and on the way home, stuck my head out of the car window to catch the wind at 6okm/hr. Preparation done.

My daughter gave me Barbie's helmet for extra protection!

In my defense I have been commuting by bicycle as much as possible and feel like I had built up a reasonable cycling confidence. Not fitness necessarily, but honing what I think are essential ingredients for cycling on Cape Town roads – the ability to navigate/assess obstacles at speed and the confidence to ride as though the street is not the contested space it unfortunately is.

We set off at exactly 4:30am and made our way to Main Road for what appeared to be a rolling start. There were no official timekeepers, no marshals, no safety pins straining to stay connected to jerseys. No cars.

Once we had set off, I wasn’t sure who the race was against. Was this motley crew of experience and dedication to cycling looking to edge past the start of the days marathon events, the memory of events passed, or the rising sun?  For the first few kilometers, my challenge was holding on and letting go.

Tandem riding is quite the antithesis of what I do everyday. I freelance, I set the pace, I direct and I shape. I tie shoelaces, pack lunchboxes, write policy, wipe tears and advocate. I seldom hand control over and trust to the degree that a trip on Du Toit requires.

With an average speed of 34km/hr for the event – Captain Andrew Wheeldon had the gears, the brakes, the strategy and the steering control over it all. My job as stoker (aka back guy/girl) is to listen, follow, ignore comments about being a passenger, and direct all my energy to the job required. In my humble opinion, squealing with joy should get written into the future job spec.

Moonlight on Chappies. 65km/h downhill with a headlight and courage at the helm. The smell of the ocean as we rose up to meet Muizenberg. The highlights in the darkness were to numerous to mention. My legs burned, my cycling workpants proved to be a sound investment and for a brief moment, I cycled in an uncontested space. It was glorious.

But what is it that is keeping me smiling? Not the doing of those things.
It’s the remembering of those things. The stoker gets to look around, behind, up and enjoy it all. Not seeing straight ahead was the hardest obstacle to overcome with the greatest reward.

In all my activism, mommy-crazy determinism and pushing to make/take/change/be better, I realized that I haven’t been looking around as much.

Too much captain. Not enough stoker.

*Kirsten Wilkins is a freelance Urban Designer looking to design spaces of value by understanding the world through the eyes of other.
*Andrew Wheeldon is the Co Founder and Managing Director of BEN (Bicycle Empowerment Network) and has more cycling experience than can be measured.